Recently we are under pressure of motivational and coaching
stuff. Sometimes it sounds silly, like an shamanism, but one can really find
some value in it. I think that the value can be found for example by teaching
people how to talk with their bodies. Our body language is the oldest way to
communicate with each other. Even when we as a species couldn’t speak, we could
already understand our emotions just by looking at the presence of other human.
Our body position is very important, when you see a person
that holds crooked position, you already can tell something about him or her.
It looks like people can read the emotions from each other. So the question is,
how to become a person, that can’t be read? Or how to manipulate this body
language to improve your presence? I’ll try to highlight some techniques in
this article.
So as mentioned above, quite important thing is to hold
upright body position. This shows your confidence, ability to make decisions.
Also it means that you can be an open-minded person and open for a contact from
other people. It also makes a person more attractive, because you look taller.
Now let’s have a break from reading and let’s listen to
Allan Pease, who describes some body language techinques:
As mentioned in the video on the beginning, another
important thing is the way you shake hand. It’s this 4 deciding minutes that
will tell if you go along with somebody or reject that person. So about
handshakes, the most importnat thing is to hold the other person hand with the
same strength as he/she does. That will mean that it’s not that easy to
dominate you. Second thing is to hold the hand straight, which is more breifly described
on the video.
Another thing is your palms. When you move the palms of your
hands to your interlocutor direction, you will show that you have nothing to
hide. When you try to hide your hands it can be read that you actually can be
guilty of something, and that can be interpreted on many ways.
The last one is eyes. Eyes can tell everything about human.
It’s advisable to keep an eye contact with the interlocutor but not for too
long. You can be perceived as a liar. If you run away from eye contact, you can
be perceived as a shy person, a person that has something to hide.
I know that maybe you can already be aware of those body
language techniques, because they are quite common, but who didn’t know, here
is something new that you should be aware of, for those who already knew that,
a quick reminder đ The way we look really describes us
sometimes, and of course it shouldn’t be a daily routine to act using this
techniques, because what’s really beautiful in us humans is our diversity.
- Does the position of the body affects how you perceive a person?
- Do you use any body language techniques to improve your presence?
- Do you think it’s important to keep in mind how you look on a business meeting?
When I meet new person I don’t think to much about his or her body language, but obviously it affects my impression. Perceiving other people is not a conscious process, or rather some part of it is not conscious. Sometimes I don’t know why person makes bad or good impression.
ReplyDeleteI don’t use body language to manipulate or improve presence, I rather use it to strengthen what I say or emphasize importance of information. On a business meeting it’s important to keep in mind your presence. But I think it’s very difficult to control some signs of being uncertain. If you are convinced that what you do or say is worthless your body betrays it. On the other hand controlling yourself (more than usual, because we control ourselves all the time) is very stressful.
Yes, I agree with you totally. Especially about stressful part of controlling yourself too much. Don't you think that we as a society got too much into this whole coaching stuff and we are less honest to each other?
Delete“Coaching stuff” and the whole atmosphere in corporations are certainly responsible for being less honest to each other, but I don’t agree that it concerns society. It concerns only small group of people. Most of society wouldn’t never have contact with such techniques, because they don’t work in such companies (imagine a seller in a greengrocer’s).
DeleteSome time ago I've started reading about the body language and psychological approaches and manipulation, what made me reflect on few things. When I noticed that a lot of small gestures and behaviours can change my view on someone I was impressed how little things can change whole perception. I'm always trying to work on my gestures and body language but sometimes it's very difficult to keep to, especially when sometimes the positive techniques are being received as dominant. Sometimes on business meetings I'm getting really confused, it really depends on the relations between coworkers.
ReplyDeleteYeah, as always stress can paralyze you, and as body language is a technique, you have to control yourself what can be challenging under stress. Thank you for your comment :)
DeleteBody language tells a lot about a person. It’s legacy of our ancestors. Our animal nature. We can draw a conclusion within seconds just taking a look at someone. It happens on subconscious level so we don’t even have to think of it. It’s the same thing when we find someone attractive. This is not a question of conscious decision. It’s rather inner, muffled voice. I do pay attention to my body language. What’s interesting that it works on the principle of a feedback loop. Your mood impacts your posture and on the other way your body language has great influence on your mood and attitude to life. I rarely take part in business meetings but I believe it’s quite important. That’s way salesmen have dedicated trainings.
ReplyDeleteYeah, it's quite of a business right now to teach people how to present themselves on a business meetings. And I agree, you can't cheat yourself, sometimes it's hard to be someone else when you feel bad. But that's probably what they would teach you :D
DeleteI agree that a body language is an important factor to leave the best first impression behind. Most of them comes naturally and we intuitively know how does the other person whom we are talking with feel. These techniques you've mentioned in your article are indeed quite familiar and common. It doesn't mean, however that they're being used by everyone. Some of them require learning and it is sometimes not that easy to master.
ReplyDeleteI use all of these techniques personally, although I do not think about them anymore, they're more natural right now. That is definitely a core aspect of each meeting to present yourself as a self confident person who knows what to do and what he wants to achieve.
This is very important in interpersonal relations, and in particular in work. In my opinion, it is a very important skill in business to know what body language to use. I usually try to keep eye contact and notice that when I do this, the interlocutor is more involved in the conversation. It was very difficult for me to learn, because I often looked in the opposite direction, but I noticed the benefits of this. Another thing I use, I do not cross my hands during a conversation, because it suggests closing on interlocutor. Aparition in business is the most important thing. The product will not sell itself if a person does not help him.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment :) And thanks for sharing your own techniques.
DeleteI don't really perceive people through the prism of position of body or gestures or I do it but unconsciously. But, I heard many times about how body language is important during formal and informal conversations. Personally, I know that I have problem with keeping eye contact with the interlocutor, which may discourage him from talking. For some time, however, I'm trying to get away from it. On the other hand, I don't think that all gestures mean something. For example, crossing hands on the chest should mean a closed posture, but for me, for example, it is simply more comfortable when a conversation takes place in a larger group and I listen to the other person's statements.
ReplyDelete1.
ReplyDeleteYes definitely it changes a lot how I look and treat a person by the position it shows. This way we can make assumptions about people at first glance.
2.
I try to not cross my hands when I’m talking to people or just standing. I try to stand straight with confidence. Small things but it helps every day.
3.
It is crucial to remember about body language during the meetings. This way you can subtly influence other people and change the way they are looking at you.
For me it also helps to try to be more relaxed, tense people tend to look less professional. Just breathe and believe in yourself.
1. I don't consciously pay attention to it, but it seems to me that we subconsciously perceive certain positions that we attribute to the guilds. eg. A hunched man - sad, uncertain.
ReplyDelete2. I don't use any techniques. Honestly, I don't even know how to do it.
I have a problem with slouching and I know that an upright posture signals self-confidence.
On the other hand, I'm not confident so my attitude captures exactly what I feel. However, it is totally unconscious.
3. I rarely go to business meetings. I used to have fun stuff at work. A raid to work in my boyfriend's sweatshirt and gaiters.
It turned out that no one informed me about the meeting with the client. My boss stood up to the task and lent me her clothes.
The fun of the situation is that I wear a size S and She wear XXL.
I looked quite hilarious in Hwenter big marina and shirt but nevertheless I was confident I went to a meeting that was very good.
Personally, I've never looked at a person like that. Usually, I approached very neutrally to give time. I get to know a person after it is in different situations.
ReplyDeleteNo, but it is very interesting that through such details you can learn a lot about a man. I always try to be honest and smiling. At the beginning of my acquaintance I am more distant.
A business meeting is a special situation. They require certain behaviors from us. We often have such meetings with our clients, and in such a situation we must behave seriously and professionally. Respect time both for yourself and the client, and at the same time keep the meeting as pleasant for both parties.
1. To be honest I'm not sure, because I never kept too much attention to it, but on the other hand maybe it does subconsciously and I'm just not aware of it.
ReplyDelete2. I try to keep eye contact with the person that is talking and to not cross my arms, but I do this mostly because I feel like it would be rude to do otherwise.
3. I think it is, especially if you are meeting with the client for the first time. People are more likely to do business with person who is likeable and seem confident in his/her skills. So it definitely helps.
1. If the position of the body influences somehow how I perceive another person, it is done in a subconscious manner. The only thing I pay attention to is excessive body language and I perceive it as stress.
ReplyDelete2. I don't think, and I certainly don't do it consciously. I have never been very interested in this topic. I always focus mainly on the substantive part.
3. I think it is very important especially at the first meeting with a potential client. At every meeting, I try to look elegant and neat.
Being able to read body language is crucial in many situations, not only in business negotiations but whats more important in police negotiations. Whats mentioned in the article and in the video, is mostly how to present yourself in position of power, but that is not what we always need, very often we simply want to be perceived in a given ways according to what we want to achieve. Also there are differences in body language between men and women,
ReplyDeletebetween different races and cultural origins of our interlocutor.
To sum up, its very beneficial to be able to read body language and event more to be able to present with our body, but we shouldn't rely solely on it when having important negotiations.
I believe that body language influences the perception of other people, a little less aware of how I am perceived by others. After a conversation with a newly-met person, it usually leaves me the impression whether this person arouses my sympathy or whether I do not want to deal with it.
ReplyDeleteI do not use any body language techniques. I do not think I have developed acting abilities, and my attempts to influence my body language would be inept and easy to decipher. I am experiencing my natural appearance, I focus more on what I say and not what my body can signal.
Better knowledge of the body language would be useful for identifying people who manipulate their body language. I would be definitely less trusting with such people.
Body language can say lots of our conversation partner. Folded arms, crossed fingers or legs are the most common and known gestures, which we know what means, but if we study more, we will know, rubbing nose mostly seems that we are not telling the truth or we have allergy :) Some gestures are just instinct and can uncover truly intention. we can learn some techniques that make our presentation more convincing. Also our look should be appropriate to business meeting, you can’t wear tracksuit when you have official meeting with your CFO.
ReplyDeleteBody language definitely affects how I perceive a person. I read that people are subconsciously reading all those signs even if we don't focus and pay attention to them. They are countless books and guides on how to use our body language to help us communicate with other people. Maintaining eye contact or gesticulation can strengthen our message. Personally I never use those techniques to improve my presence. I never remember to use them and I don't think that I can even do them properly. I would like to learn those technique someday. They can be useful in both business meetings and personal life.
ReplyDeleteI always had the issue, that people said that my handshake is like a dead fish, without strength. I think some people pay a lot of attention to body language, especially women. They see it as a way of expressing politeness and good manners.I guess it’s also cultural, in some parts of the world people use more body sings. For example in China you should lower your head and bend slightly to show respect. In addition, people of different statuses in China do not shake hands. Shaking hands is reserved for those who are of the same social status, are friends, or interact as business people. In Asia it’s
ReplyDeletealso considered rude to make eye contact-something considered as normal in Europe.
I agree that the way we dress influences how people percept us. It should be corresponding to the situation and surrounding.
Totally agree, position of the body affects how we're perceiving a person. It's really easy to see and check if somebody is stressed or not.Sometimes, I use some body language techniques (before presentations) to improve by confidence and generally, they work.
ReplyDeleteOn a business meeting, it's really important how you're dressed, how you are speaking, with eyes contact or not.
It is very important to make a good impression at business meetings, good body language helps. Salesmen know that, as well as other people who have contact with business. Sometimes I have the impression, that the truth is secondary. When we hunch, no one will take us seriously. During professional meetings, I try to be upright, confident, to look at the person in the eye and be focused on the conversation. The rest comes alone.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion most of people build their impression on first sigh and create opinion about someone or something that way. It's not easy to block our minds from associating things becouse that's how perception works. I think that the most important thing between human relations is to stay open minded and have tolerance for differences. Of course you should remember about proper manners especially when official situation comes but as you mention our kind have a huge range of diversity which also includes the difficulties that others might seem trivial. Personally I'm using few tricks that help me with communication e.g proper hand shake or looking on tip of the nose when having an eye contact but I believe that the most important thing is to be empathic while being with others.
ReplyDelete1. Yes, it does. For example by sitting in a inappropriate position during formal meeting can be crucial for me. I can’t imagine how I could go on a job interview when an employer would use his arms to hold his head on. It would be a disaster for both sides.
ReplyDelete2. Yes I do. I never cross my arms to not be interpreted as somone who is bored or afraid. I also remember to keep an eye contact when I meet new person because it makes me more kind and friendly.
3. Of course it is. You can’t show disrespect in any way to a business partner. Like how you can discuss with someone who is not following a dress code. That person is going to be less truthfully and can fail to achieve something on that meeting.
Yes, it's obvious that the body language changes our reception of the person. If we know body language techniques, we can consciously pay attention to certain behaviours and draw out more appropriate conclusions. I know the basics of body language, but I do not focus on them, because I rarely perform in public. In the case of business meetings or job interviews, I have always been natural. An appropriate look on a business meeting is essential, after all, we do not want to be remembered as someone who looked slovenly. On the other hand, we should not dress too extravagantly, so that the attention of the interlocutor is focused on us and not on our outfit.
ReplyDelete1. Ofcourse it does. It makes a difference if a person looks bored or excited when he or she is talking with you. Even if you are not interested in the think someone is saying you should act like you do because it can only help you.
ReplyDelete2. Ofcourse I do. I prefere to make a good impression on my listener. If it is my work colleague it is much better to make a good impression than not.
3. Ofcourse. The way you look on a business meeting can prevail on the ending effect of the conversation.
The position of the body can say more than words, so I often pay attention to the smallest gestures and draw conclusions on this person. Sometimes it happens that the conclusions are hasty and I am wrong. The most important thing for me in contact with another person is eye contact. I try not to be presumptuous and shy, but it's quite hard to keep the right proportions to make it perfect :) At business meetings, important matters are discussed and the slightest gesture can be beneficial to either party. Appearance at such meetings is an important aspect, so make sure it is impeccable and appropriate to the situation.
ReplyDelete1. Does the position of the body affects how you perceive a person?
ReplyDeleteOf course. Somebody can stand straight, keep their shoulders up, eyes locked on you - it speaks total confidence. It can be total opposite too.
2. Do you use any body language techniques to improve your presence?
Yes. I try to keep my eyes on the person I talk to. I avoid crossing my shoulders - it means that I am trying to defend myself, kinda agressive stance. During business meetings, I keep my shoulders straight, I try to achieve confident look - it's a good idea if we are presenting product or results in front of the clients :)
3. Do you think it’s important to keep in mind how you look on a business meeting?
Yes, as I said before - confident looks is a key. But! If business meeting is with somebody we know very well, maybe we are on friendly basis with them - no point in trying to look confident. Relaxed pose will be much better for the results of the meeting!
1. Does the position of the body affects how you perceive a person?
ReplyDelete2. Do you use any body language techniques to improve your presence?
3. Do you think it’s important to keep in mind how you look on a business meeting?
1. Yes, it does. In fact very much. Among a few features of appearance such as a beauty, look, cleanliness, the way in which a person moves matters too.
2. I am afraid I do not control it so perfectly and I am not aware of all my movements during public presentations although I am trying to remember not to do any particulary wrong moves ;9
3. Yes, of course! It shows a confidence and variety of attributes which can help to achieve business goals.